The Knight's Mysterious Maid-Chapter 408: Future (2)

"I’m seeing a new side to you that I am thoroughly enjoying, Annalise. You were the one to bring up children even if it was to please your father, and now you are running away. You should have known that I would be up for it," said Rafael.

"I knew you would be ready but I didn’t think you’d be making plans to do it so soon. You looked at me as if you were ready to forget about going to the palace and staying in bed all day. It doesn’t matter to me, but I thought with your upbringing you would want to get married first. Are we to rush to a church tonight and then start trying to make a child?" Annalise asked.

She still thought she wasn’t ready to be someone’s mother, but even with a lot of planning was anyone ever truly ready? There was a lot she worried about like having that mother’s love for her child. She was not exactly like most women and worried about the connection not being there.

Annalise never had to worry about this before her relationship with Rafael. Even one day becoming his wife made her nervous. Nothing was going to change other than her name, but it strangely felt like a lot would change. Like she would have more responsibility and Annalise didn’t know if she would succeed.

She needed to talk to her mother to know if it was normal for other women to start becoming so concerned when their relationships were starting to get more serious.

Rafael was making a big step to move his life to the border for her and they were already like a married couple at this point. They were also not doing anything to prevent her from becoming pregnant unless they waited for signs and used the measures people who didn’t want children took. Still, Annalise couldn’t bring herself to do that.

Rafael thought of Edgar’s offer to find them a priest. They could get married fast if they wanted but Rafael already had it planned out that he would propose to her when they were to go on a trip alone.

"We will not have a rushed wedding, Annalise. I intend to propose to you at the right time. Let you plan the wedding you want with our mothers. Give you time to decide how you wish to decorate the new manor. I want a lot of thought put into when we marry each other because it is a memory we should look back on and enjoy," Rafael said, wanting it to be done right.

"You seem to have been doing a lot of thinking about our future. Building a new town will be hectic. I wonder if we would have time to get married during that time. What am I even saying when you have not proposed yet?" Annalise wondered, peering down at her hand that was without a ring.

She thought they should enjoy more time together like this as they were not married, but recently she felt eager to become his wife. Though they spoke of a wedding and a future together, she still had to wait for Rafael to propose unless she would reverse it all and propose to him.

"We should talk about something else," Annalise said as she didn’t want to be spoiled when Rafael was going to propose to her. "I don’t want to worry about becoming someone’s mother now so my father will have to wait a little longer for a grandchild. We should take it slow and have a child when the time is right without trying."

"Would it scare you if you were pregnant now?" Rafael questioned as what Edgar said still lingered in his mind. What if all now they were going to be parents but they were not aware? "There is a chance because of how long we have been sharing a bed, but we will have to wait a little longer to know."

Annalise looked away from Rafael to the path they were walking down. "I accepted what would come from us lying together from the start. A child wasn’t on my mind until now because of the truce and it might be bad timing because of the conflict we will have in the palace, but I would be excited. Scared but excited."

"If I were to freak out and not respond to anything you say to me, it is not because I wouldn’t want the child. It would be because I have this growing fear of the mother I would be. It is so silly and came out of nowhere. I just hope you don’t think I am not happy then," Annalise added so they could avoid a misunderstanding in the future.

"I understand," Rafael replied.

He was looking forward to starting a family with Annalise and like her, he also shared her concerns about becoming a father. It was exciting to look forward to but then they would be both responsible for the life of someone. Making sure no harm fell on the child and they were well loved. He knew it wouldn’t be as easy as saying that was what they needed to do.

"And I must admit that it has crossed my mind since we separated for me to go back to the border, but if I could, I would have taken Lydia from the orphanage with me. There is something about her that I cannot forget and I think of her, but then I think it might be wrong to take her after one meeting. So if there is anything I can do for her while she is waiting for a family to take her, please tell me so I can rest my mind," said Annalise.

She didn’t understand why sometimes her mind went back to Lydia and she worried about the child being off alone by herself while the others played together. She hoped that Lydia would teach the other children how to climb a tree and make friends who would be by her side until the time came for a family to come for her.

Annalise frowned because now she thought of Lydia being taken by a family, there was a weird feeling in her chest. "I think I am not like myself these days and I do not know why. Maybe I am pregnant," Annalise joked.

She was thinking of things that never crossed her mind in the past. Maybe it was as she said that her relationship with Rafael was getting more serious so there was a lot to think about. She had to think differently as she did in the past as all her plans had to include Rafael now.

"I will find out what we can do for her. You can meet with her again to be certain that you wish to take her from the orphanage. You can meet as many times as you wish and let it be known you want to take her with you. You only need to be certain you want to be her mother to not get her excited for nothing,’ said Rafael.

He could send off a letter now to let it be known they were going to return to see Lydia.

"If I eventually take her, she wouldn’t be just my child then. You wouldn’t mind caring for a child that doesn’t share your blood?" Annalise asked as not many people would be so open to caring for a child not sharing their blood.

She couldn’t bring Lydia from the orphanage if Rafael didn’t truly like it. Annalise didn’t want him to be doing this just for her. He should be open to doing it because he also liked Lydia.

Rafael pulled Annalise close to his body so he could help keep her warm from the cold air. "It seems you forgot how my family is. Sharing blood doesn’t matter."