Love Affairs in Melbourne-Chapter 217 - 214: It’s Good to Be Normal

Yan Yan shook his head; his peculiar younger brother was someone you just couldn’t reason with on common grounds.

After Jiao Zhifei had pressed Yan Yan’s hand down, she didn’t try to raise it again and instead walked over to the cashier to settle the bill.

She felt it was necessary to thank the owner and mention that she would be a regular customer in the future.

Yan Yan hadn’t taken two steps before Jiao Zhifei pulled her back.

"Why are you pulling me? I’m going to pay. Don’t tell me, after all this fuss, you don’t want to go back yet?" Yan Yan didn’t know why Jiao Zhifei was stopping her.

"As a lady, why are you fighting with a guy over the bill?" Jiao Zhifei looked at her disdainfully and returned an eye roll that suggested she was beyond help.

"Zhifei, my classmate, did I hear that right? Did you say you’re going to pay?" Yan Yan had an expression as if she had seen a ghost.

"You heard right, but you misunderstood. I’m not rushing to pay for the dinner and this ham, because I’ve already paid," Jiao Zhifei said with a smug face.

"When did you pay?" Yan Yan was a bit incredulous.

Jiao Zhifei’s bizarre thought process wasn’t planning to dine and dash with her today, was it?

"When you went to the bathroom after ordering the wine," Jiao Zhifei clarified for Yan Yan.

"Really? When did you change your ways? Weren’t you the one telling me to cover meals, lodging, and shopping? When have you ever treated me to a meal?" Yan Yan had already been surprised by Jiao Zhifei several times today.

"What do you mean by ’change your ways’?" Jiao Zhifei was very dissatisfied with Yan Yan’s second question.

"That’s not the point, okay!" Yan Yan was already somewhat accustomed to Jiao Zhifei’s way of missing the main point.

"How is that not the point? If gender isn’t important, are you a guy?" Jiao Zhifei challenged.

"Yeah, that’s right, I am definitely a guy. You really paid the bill already?" Yan Yan sought confirmation from Jiao Zhifei.

"Of course, it’s true. Just because I haven’t treated you in the past doesn’t mean I will never treat you.

Back when we were in school, wasn’t your allowance dozens of times more than mine? Who else should treat but you?

And, during middle school, besides me, was there anyone else willing to let you treat them?

Look, even if I’m part of the middle-to-high income group now, what’s the point in letting a woman pay for a meal?" There was a bit of male chauvinism in Jiao Zhifei.

Jiao Zhifei brought up the past when Yan Yan was targeted and indeed, at that time, he was the only one who would deign to associate with her.

Strangely enough, it seemed like Yan Yan had already forgotten what exactly had happened back in middle school.

Yan Yan’s memory was selective, only remembering what she chose to.

Somehow, her memories before elementary school seemed much clearer than those from middle school.

"Wow, impressive, my little brother. No wonder Zhifei said he’d take home a ham." Yan Yan showed an expression of sudden realization and simultaneously gave two thumbs up.

"That’s right. This is bought with your brother’s hard-earned money." Jiao Zhifei hugged the ham against his chest a bit tighter.

"No wonder—oh, now I get it. I thought this ham not only looked pitiful but also smelled sweaty; it turns out the scent came from you," Yan Yan teased with a laugh.

"Don’t you dare insult your brother and his leg," Jiao Zhifei protested.

"Why would I insult your leg? If I were to insult anything, I’d have to start from the head and work my way down to the feet," Yan Yan protested too.

"Old Sister, are you actually going to take me in the day after tomorrow?" Jiao Zhifei wouldn’t easily let go of a matter that he wanted to get to the bottom of.

"Sure, take, take, take, you and Bao Bao can stay at my place, and I’ll just go stay in a hotel. Does that work for you?" Yan Yan proposed her "best" solution.

"That’s the right attitude, Old Sister, but you’re seriously off the mark with your intelligence. I’ve only ever mentioned coming over on the weekend. When did you hear me say that I would be staying at your place on the night of the day after tomorrow?" Jiao Zhifei queried Yan Yan.

"I just asked you how many days you’d stay, and you said ’the weekend, and then I have two more days of annual leave.’ I really should’ve recorded your words." Yan Yan often found it hard to argue logically with Jiao Zhifei.

For someone as stubborn and hard to persuade as him, only his own words could serve as "evidence in court."

"What’s the point in recording? I did say that, and I haven’t denied it," Jiao Zhifei felt there was absolutely no need for Yan Yan to go to such trouble.

"Then why are you asking me which ear?" Yan Yan looked utterly disheartened.

"What good is your logical science mind if you can’t comprehend a simple human language?

You should replace the commas with periods in your understanding of what I said.

Then, you will realize that I am talking about two separate things.

Based on your understanding, wouldn’t I have simply answered ’four days’?

What I meant, of course, is that the weekend is certain, and what follows depends on the situation," Jiao Zhifei, who had often been belittled by Yan Yan for "you literature students," decided today to reclaim the honor of literature students.

"Punctuation, huh? Impressive, my little brother." Yan Yan was genuinely impressed with Jiao Zhifei’s persistence over matters like punctuation.

Back in middle school, Jiao Zhifei had argued with Yan Yan for an entire semester over how best to punctuate the famous repeated-character couplet from Jiangxin Island in Wenzhou, "云朝朝朝朝朝朝朝朝散,潮长长长长长长长长消". (note 1)

"How would I know if you have plans on Monday? How could I possibly finalize my schedule like that? Don’t you have any common sense?" Jiao Zhifei asked Yan Yan.

Common sense? Since when did Jiao, the eccentric, have any common sense?

Debts always need to be repaid, if not now, then later.

In any case, Yan Yan was bound to be lectured thoroughly by Jiao Zhifei today.

"Oh brother, you’ve grown up and started to think with common sense. Your sister is very comforted. You finally look like what a normal person should." Responding in kind was one of Yan Yan’s most important life principles.

"Normal is good, normal is good. I just can’t stand how you’re always saying I have no logic and am not normal." To Yan Yan’s surprise, Jiao Zhifei readily accepted her criticism.

Jiao Zhifei had not seen Yan Yan for half a year and seemed a bit different from before.

As to exactly where he had changed, Yan Yan couldn’t quite put her finger on it. Even though eccentric events still unfolded around Jiao, he seemed to have a more down-to-earth vibe now.

It’s said that heartbreak facilitates growth. The origin of the saying is unclear, and its truth is debatable, but it seemed quite appropriate when applied to Jiao Zhifei.

...

Note 1:

The couplet with repeated characters takes up many characters to annotate the pronunciation and explanation, so let’s just put this five hundred-word note in the author’s remarks.

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