[BL] Debut in Interstellar After Retiring as Grim Reaper-Chapter 142: Human

Chapter 142: Human

Others looked at him in surprise, especially Ji Wen whom he once had talked to about He Li’s condition that he rejected.

"Okay!" Ji Wen quickly nodded and even enthusiastically led the others outside the training room and closed the door afterwards.

Silence engulfed the room for a few seconds before Qin An led He Li to sit on the floor near the mirror wall of the room.

Qin An once again raises his hand and places it on He Li’s back before a wave of spiritual energy penetrates.

Feeling the gentle energy, He Li’s stiff back gradually relaxes. As he felt the pain on his body lessen, he glanced at the young man from the mirror on the side and saw Qin An just staring at his back blankly.

He Li lowered his eyes before deciding to break the ice.

"What happened?" he asked.

Qin An snapped back to his senses and told him about what happened earlier. "I need to see Xiaopang’s father too and solve his matters."

"Okay. I’ll help you."

Qin An just nodded and the atmosphere went silent again.

He Li pauses for a moment before asking again. "What about Bai Yue inside Bai Ling’s body?" He turned his head to look at the young man directly. "You’ve said that possession is a crime that a soul mustn’t do, what are your plans?"

Qin An didn’t answer him... or precisely because he didn’t know how to.

He himself didn’t know why at the end he didn’t let Bai Yue out when he had the power to force him and send him directly to the underworld just like what he did to Xiaopang.

He shouldn’t do it. Qin An knew that Bai Yue already crossed the line and he should have stopped it.

But he didn’t. Why?

After such thoughts earlier... Qin An wanted to try.

He wanted to know and see what would happen if he let the soul itself take revenge for himself. Will it even endanger the humans more? Will that cause chaos? Will that lead to another problem again?

Or... will that finally fulfill his wish to leave this world voluntarily?

What will be the differences from the souls he guided in the past and now?

Since everyone has a lot to say about his decisions, then he’ll give it a chance. freēwēbηovel.c૦m

"I’ll talk to him later." Qin An answered. He Li nodded.

After a few minutes of giving energy, the resentment from Xiaopang’s attacked finally dissipated so Qin An remove his hand and was about to stand up when he saw He Li frown a bit.

Even if that was just probably a subconscious reaction and He Li doesn’t even let his expression fall noticeably.

This made Qin An pause and it also made He Li look at him in doubt.

Qin An pursues his lips. "What happened to your head?"

He Li shook his head lightly. "It’s fine."

"Ji Wen told me about your condition last time," he added. He Li frowned.

"Don’t listen to him—"

"Marshal..." Qin An interrupt the man and couldn’t help but asked a question that was on his mind a long time ago. "Why did you become a soldier?"

He Li was surprised by his question. Qin An added his thoughts. "Did you become a soldier because of your family?"

"Yes. My ancestors had served in the military." He Li answered. Qin An’s head tilted a bit in confusion.

"Then you’re just serving because your family does so?"

"What do you mean?"

Qin An’s eyes were filled with doubt, a rare emotion from him in the past but became frequent when he became a human. "You served the world because that was what fate told you so?"

A word caught He Li’s attention. "Fate?"

"Yes." Qin An nods. "Just like being a grim reaper. It is my fate even when I became a human, so I am here to do my job again."

He Li didn’t answer him but looked at him for a moment. The young man was different from the last time they talked. He was sharp, cold and firm about his decision back then. He was like the mecha that was made to be their shield and assist them to fight against Zergs.

A machine that only follows their instruction and an existence for just doing one thing— to help.

But right now, he was like... a child who finally bore his own consciousness.

A machine that had a heart and emotions to feel something.

... And a human.

He Li exhales a light breath before he moves slightly and leans on the mirror to completely face the young man.

"It’s true," he answers. "My ancestors had served the country and thus it is inevitable for me to do it too. And that’s what I did... at first."

He Li wasn’t used to expressing his personal thoughts nor even sharing his experience like this. But looking at the young man who had lost his way, he decided to do it for the first time.

"I experienced many things. I fought to become strong, I fought with the enemies— all of them are for one thing, and that is to protect."

He lowered his eyes and continued to speak. "There is indeed a doubt as to why we sacrificed many things for others, but I think... that’s why we are human."

"???" Qin An was stunned by his last words. That’s why they are human?

"... You are willing to die because you’re a human?"

"Humans are too complicated. Everyone has various reasons why they want to live— for themselves or for others, but they will always unite for one thing."

"What?"

"Peace."

He Li lightly rubbed his fingertips and felt the rough calluses. "Humans can be as one to protect the peace they have. It’s the one thing that they are willing to sacrifice even their life."

"One thing... then are there other reasons?"

"Because we are humans."

"???" His ambiguous words made Qin An fell in confusion again.

"There are some things that you will only understand if you can feel and experience them." He Li still chose to indirectly answer him.

Qin An was silent for a while. Then, if he couldn’t still feel what he was talking about, he’s not qualified to be a human?"

"Why don’t you try it? You already started by letting Bai Yue..." He Li slightly paused his words when he felt his head ache. He raises his hand and rubs his temples.

"..."

Qin An didn’t answer but frowned a bit when he noticed the man’s action.

Remembering his spiritual energy, he finally decided to do something again.

"I can help you with your pollution." He directly stated.

Their eyes met again.

"You said protecting the peace is one of the reasons and I think helping you deal with your pollution can help others too, right? I think your companions will only have peace if your pollution will heal, Marshal."

Qin An raised his hand and felt the blood flowing inside him, indicating his identity as a human. "However, this might take too long. I’m already a human and my body cannot take it further. But we can ease it bit by bit."

"Why?" He Li asked.

Qin An pursed his lips and didn’t answer for a while.

It was unknown how much time he thought about the most plausible answer until such time, the young man’s lips parted and answered him— that even still using his normal cold voice, an emotion which he didn’t know what it called can be keenly noticed.

"... Because I chose to be a human."

Even if he couldn’t remember why in the first place.

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