There's No Love In the Deathzone (BL)-Chapter 56 - 55. Just Like That

The first touch of their lips after two months was filled with caution. Even while Zein didn’t show his objection, Bassena only pressed his lips lightly, amber eyes staring straight into the deep blue.

He kissed once, and paused, waiting for rejection. And then he saw the blue eyes move, the long lashes fluttered, and Bassena pressed his lips harder, bared of any more inhibition. It didn’t take coaxing for their lips to part and slot snuggly, as if kissing was just a daily occurrence for them. The esper felt Zein shift slightly, feeling a hand reaching for his hair.

"No," Bassena caught the guide’s wrist, breathing low against the wet lips. "I didn’t ask for guiding."

The amber eyes were firm. He had thought about it a lot during the past two months, during the days and nights in which the guide’s presence always stayed firm inside his heart. Zein always attributed his attraction as a byproduct of guiding attachment, locking their possible relationship as a mere guide and esper.

But that wasn’t what Bassena wanted. At least, that wasn’t all.

In the past, he thought having Zein guide him only for the rest of his life was what he was after. But that wasn’t it. When it occurred to him that Zein might never want to speak to him ever again after that night, it was devastating. He wanted to be with the man, even if he couldn’t guide him.

But what could he do, to this man that saw the world as a treacherous place filled with disgusting power-play?

Bassena thought then; he simply had to show him that there was no power-play in the relationship he pursue. That it wasn’t about an esper and a guide. That it wasn’t just a guiding attachment.

That right now, he kissed Zein as a man—not an esper looking for guiding.

The blue eyes stared deeply, calm like always. But there was a slight ripple on its surface, as the reaching hand halted and slacked on the esper’s hold.

"I got it,"

The soft sighing sound was all Bassena needed to resume their kiss, deeper this time, no longer being cautious. It was filled with longing, and done as if he was kissing a lover he hadn’t seen in years. The kind of kiss that made the other person melt in unavoidable pleasure.

But even as he felt Zein kissing him back, Bassena knew it was just a physical reaction. He had realized before, that despite his principle of avoiding sex with espers, the guide wasn’t some prude, bashful man. He was true to his desire, and did not shy away from physical contact.

But that was exactly the problem. Zein built a wall around his heart even when he bared his body. For him, it was just a matter of physical needs and nothing more. Zein seemed to sternly follow this mindset, for whatever reason. Perhaps fear, perhaps survival.

When they parted their lips, Bassena wanted to laugh at himself. It felt like karma, the world getting back at him for breaking so many hearts in the past, seeing people as a lump of flesh and tool for satisfying his carnal needs.

Seeing how calm Zein was, even after the passionate kiss that made the esper’s heart race with anxiety and joy, he couldn’t even feel disappointed or sad. It just felt like divine retribution, and he couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle at the end.

"What?" the guide tilted his head, the blue eyes remained as nonchalant as ever. Pretty. Pretty and cruel.

Bassena let go of the wrist he had been holding all this while, and looked down, placing his palm above the guide’s steadily beating heart. "I’m gonna try it no matter what," he smiled, saying it more for himself than for Zein. The amber eyes flicked upward, staring at the confused face. "Obtaining your heart, that is."

Zein did not give him any reply, but the fact that the guide didn’t scoff or tell him off was enough for Bassena.

"Did you say that to all your past lovers?"

Bassena, who was in the middle of shuffling back into his seat, paused. He looked at the impassive face who just spat out a provocative question with a smile. "I have no past lovers."

Zein raised his brow, staring dubiously at the handsome face plastered all over the Eastern Federation’s billboards.

"I’ve never gone out with anyone," Bassena smirked and started the car. It was the truth; at most, he played around and have one night stands during his academy days. And then he was getting too busy climbing the towers and taking revenge. As a public figure prone to scandal, Bassena didn’t really attend parties anymore after founding Trinity, and his sexual activity consisted of being guided.

Although, he never did that again in the past two months.

"Why?" Zein, somehow, sounded quite intrigued.

Bassena had no idea whether he could take this positively, or protect his mind by not raking up false hope. "Obviously because I’ve never fallen for someone before," he smiled. Either way, he would just blast through it head-on as he planned. "Before I met you, anyway."

Zein pressed the button of his mask, hiding his face and with it, any expression Bassena could catch. "And you fell for me, just like that?"

Bassena chuckled as the car drove through the bridge, the river still sparkling with city lights. It also sparked some old memories; of a glowing mirage, of a humble low-grade potion, of a scribble over torn paper. "Mm, just like that," he said easily, with a soft smile and warm amber.

Zein pressed his lips as the blue eyes hardened. Perhaps it would be nice if he also had clear memories of that day, instead of a blurry sensation of trying to survive. Unlike Bassena, he had no great impression of that day, and he didn’t think he would reciprocate the kind of feeling Bassena hoped for.

Obtaining his heart—Zein looked down, at a tight seal he placed there, the heavy locks around his neck. It would be better if he could. Perhaps the curse he put on himself could be lifted then.

Was that why he just let Bassena try? Humoring the esper’s attempt to win him over?

Perhaps, this time, Zein did want his heart to be taken, if it was possible at all.

"Don’t go crying if you failed later," Zein crossed his arms, staring absentmindedly at the glittering dark river.

"It’s alright," Bassena smirked, glancing at the guide with curled eyes. "At least I know you’re interested in my body," and then he added with a joyful tone. "And I already received your hand pat, so I’m okay."

"You’re as persistent as ever," Zein sighed, leaning back into the car seat again.

Bassena laughed openly, without an ounce of discouragement. "I won’t be able to become the world’s strongest if I’m not," he even had a leeway to wink, looking as flirtatious as his commercial ads.

"Hmm? Aren’t you the strongest already?" Zein narrowed his eyes as he turned to look at Bassena. Was this esper bragging or something?

"You mean because I’m the youngest Saint-class?" Bassena smiled deeply. "I can say I’m the strongest in my generation, but I can’t be too complacent and say I’m the strongest with the veteran Saint-class still around."

Zein raised his brow. That was actually quite humble of the esper, not something that Zein expected. Bassena was quite young for the amount of power and success that he had, so if he was getting arrogant and full of himself, it would be quite understandable.

Was it because Radia Mallarc put a tight leash on him? Zein vaguely remembered that the Bassena he met in that cave four years ago was still quite the arrogant brat.

"I might be able to surpass them someday, but for now, I’m still lack in experience," the esper added. Despite his humble words, however, there was a high level of confidence that he’d surely become the undisputed strongest one day.

It was rather endearing, Zein thought, as he smiled subtly.

"But do you really need to be the strongest?" Zein tilted his head. From what he saw in the Center and the guild, people had already shown a great deal of fear and respect toward him. The one who would be strong enough to deal with Bassena was probably the veterans who had no interest in petty fights anymore.

Bassena hummed for a bit, chuckling to himself. The car stopped at an intersection then, and he leaned to his hand that was propped in the window. "Of course I do," he looked at Zein, eyes curled and lips stretched wide. "I can’t ask you to be my exclusive guide otherwise,"

The blue eyes blinked then, and Zein fell into sudden contemplation. This esper...Zein was suddenly reminded of what Bassena said during the expedition;

—you don’t like working with a brat, right?

And then this...

"Did I say that too?" asked Zein.

Bassena just smiled, and hummed again as the light turned green and the car drove away again. Zein chewed the inside of his cheek, and looked outside the window again.

Being the strongest and maturing—was it really something Bassena did because of the comment Zein made in passing? Was he really having that much influence over this man? He wanted to say that he didn’t really mean anything by that, that he only said that jokingly to reject the offer.

But saying it like that would mean disrespecting Bassena’s attempt at betterment. Just because Zein wasn’t saying it seriously, didn’t mean he could just destroy the esper’s source of motivation.

And it didn’t feel bad—Zein curled his hand into a fist. Honestly, he didn’t feel bad—it just felt burdensome. But having someone fall for him that much wasn’t an unpleasant feeling, even if he knew he couldn’t reciprocate that.

This was why Zein always said that he was a cruel person.

Falling for him was just a cruel thing.

* * *

There were a lot of amazing and amusing things to find in the green-zone. Like finding he could order a bunch of gardening supplies during dinner and had them already delivered when he arrived at the dorm. Or finding his laundered combat suit already cleaned and tidy in the morning.

So Zein found himself trying the empty gym at dawn, watering all the plants on the balcony and around the room, figuring out how to use the coffee machine in the corner, and having a long warm shower just because he could.

Where else could someone think of wasting so much water if it wasn’t in the green-zone?

He came down when Abel said he was arriving at the apartment, and they met at the cafeteria then. There, finally, Zein was able to see the other residents after staying on what seemed like a ghost floor.

There weren’t many people though, probably because it was past the breakfast rush hour. Since most of the dorm residents were civilians, their clocking time was quite early. The one eating late was the espers who only needed to come for training, or the staff with afternoon shift like the guards and other guides.

Abel was standing beside the table of four guides when he spotted Zein. The tall guide’s presence immediately drew attention like usual, since he was obviously new. Abel was about to shout his name, but he closed his mouth since it seemed like Zein wouldn’t like that.

Well, the guide already walked toward him anyway.

"Sir, is that person the new guide?" one of the guides asked in a whisper after stealing a glance.

"What, you heard already?" Abel raised his brow, and another guide replied swiftly.

"Well, duh—there’s no way people wouldn’t talk if someone new coming with Sir Vaski in tow," the guide shrugged cheekily, and Abel playfully slapped the young man.

See if you could maintain your composure in front of him—Abel thought with a chuckle.

"That happened, wasn’t it?" the easygoing leader smiled widely.

The guild already suppress any news about a new A-class Guide being whisked away by Bassena from the Guide Center yesterday, so most people had no idea about the event. But Bassena did bring Zein to the guild through the lobby, and a lot of staff witnessed it, so it was bound to circulate internally.

"Well, anyway, yeah...that’s the new guide, although—ah, Zein, good morning," perhaps because he used to live in a combat active zone, Zein always moved swiftly, and it didn’t take him long to reach Abel. "How’s your dinner?"

"Morning," the tall guide answered in his low, melodious tone as usual. "Dinner’s fine, ate too much," the reply was also crisp and short as usual. Abel had used to it after spending the afternoon with Zein yesterday, but the guides at the table were almost frozen in fright.

It didn’t really show from afar, but after Zein got close, his tall and lean build startled the guides. The black combat suit and mask didn’t help either, coupled with a pair of deep blue eyes that always looked guarded. And on top of that, he gave off a sharp, spiky feeling that screamed danger. Perhaps they wouldn’t be scared if he was an esper, but knowing that the man was a guide made the others shiver as if they came to face a miasmic beast.

Right. The guides in the end zones were used to harsh environments, including brash attitudes and fully equipped personnel. They wouldn’t flinch much, even as they came to the dungeon. But these guides who spent their time in safe Temples and guilds, were prone to mental shock.

As Abel watched the other guides, he finally understood why the Guildmaster wanted to make a combat guide division. If meeting someone like Zein already scared them, what would they be inside the Deathzone?

But it wouldn’t be good for Zein if the atmosphere continued like this either, so Abel cleared his throat loudly to shift the attention. "Zein, these here are the guides staying at the dorm. There are another two, but they already left early, and the rest would be in the guide lounge later,"

Abel pointed at the guides, and they scrambled to stand up politely. Even without the golden badge, Zein let out enough aura for the low-ranking members to recognize the superiority.

The tall guide watched the four guides one by one; three wore the green uniform and one had blue. "Zein," he said shortly.

The table fell into silence for a while, as they waited for him to say something more. But as Zein just stood there wordlessly after, they realized that he had no intention to say anything other than his name.

"A-ah—yes," the flustered guides began to introduce themselves then, while Abel pressed his lips to hold back his laughter. Even the previously cheeky B-class guide fumbled with his words.

The other guides’ reaction wasn’t much different, but Zein paid no attention to it, just trying to remember their name since he was quite bad at it. The rather chubby B-class guide with a loud voice was called Brisk—Zein had no idea if it was his real name or a pet one. The other guides were Joan, Silva, and Nada, and Zein couldn’t really remember which one was which.

"Well, anyway," Abel finally took pity on the guides and chimed in. "Guide Zein is not on duty yet until next week, and he has another job at Mortix, so you might not see him often in the guide’s lounge. But do greet him and help him properly if you see him."

"Yes, Sir!" Abel wanted to laugh at how they acted politely all of a sudden. They even lined up and bowed slightly. "Please excuse us," and then they were gone as if they were chased by something, leaving Abel laughing silently beside dumbfounded Zein.

"As you can see, the ones staying here are the lowest-rank members, and they are quite timid even among guides," he patted Zein’s shoulder, secretly marveling at the sturdiness of it.

Zein stared at the receding view of the four guides, and felt like he would receive more of that reaction for the next few days while spending time in the guide’s lounge. Or when the new combat guide division was officially established. "That’s normal," he shrugged, and commented nonchalantly.

Abel laughed again, audibly this time. "Yep—so let’s get some breakfast first before I show you around the guild."