Maybe a Fake Gintama-Chapter 605: Harem Arc II

"Eh—?" Seita grumbled in dissatisfaction, "Why? And what's that got to do with you?"

"Maybe..." Hinowa smiled gently, squinting her eyes as she spoke, "Maybe he's trying to prepare himself for a certain change in status. Now, hurry along to your lessons, Seita. Otherwise, you'll be late again."

[Huh? A change in status? What kind of change? Why would I need to adjust to being a father?] Kawaki thought to himself, bewildered. [Wait, a father? A father?! No way! I need to learn how to do a Rasengan or Shadow Clone Jutsu! I can't do it! I absolutely can't do it! Besides, I hate kids! There'll be a rebellious phase and puberty and all that, and as a stepfather, disciplining them is just too sensitive! I can't handle it! I can't do it!]

"Tch, fine, I know," Seita responded grumpily as he got up, grabbed his backpack and the bento Hinowa had prepared and headed for the door.

But as he reached the door, Hinowa called, "Wait a moment, Seita. Um... would you like to have a dad—"

"If you don't hurry, you'll be late, Seita!" Kawaki quickly interrupted, sensing what Hinowa was about to ask.

"I know, geez!" Seita grumbled again, clearly annoyed, before finally exiting the door.

As Hinowa covered her mouth and chuckled softly, Kawaki internally panicked, [Stop it! Stop making that face that says, 'I never thought this man could be shy'! Stop showing that expression like you find it adorable that I'm embarrassed! Please!]

Just then, Tsukuyo suddenly clutched her stomach and gagged slightly.

"Huh? Tsukuyo, are you okay?" Hinowa asked with concern. "Are you feeling unwell?"

"No, it's nothing," Tsukuyo shook her head, her gaze softening as she looked down at her abdomen, gently rubbing it with her hand. "It's probably just a normal reaction at this stage."

At that moment, Kawaki's expression completely changed. It was as if he'd been struck by lightning. His mouth hung open, and his eyes glazed over in shock.

[Is... is she going to be a mom too?!]

"Are you sure you're okay? Maybe you should go to the hospital just to be safe?" Hinowa suggested, clearly worried.

"No, really, I'm fine." Tsukuyo turned her face away slightly, glancing at Kawaki as if to say, [I'm ready to be a mother... are you prepared to be a father?]

Catching Tsukuyo's glance, Kawaki could only nod weakly, forcing a strained smile.

[I've messed up! Just once... and now this?!] Kawaki internally screamed, holding his head in despair. [No! Please, no! I'm not ready at all! I haven't prepared at all! I'm not ready to be a father! Someone help me, please!]

[But then again...] Kawaki suddenly had another thought. [If this is true, Tsukuyo... I can't just leave things as they are. I have to come clean. There's no other choice. It might hurt others, but there's no other way; Tsukuyo is already...]

Determined, Kawaki gritted his teeth and began to speak, "Hinowa, actually..."

Before he could finish, Hinowa suddenly turned pale and covered her mouth, gagging.

Seeing Hinowa's reaction, Kawaki's jaw dropped, and his face twitched uncontrollably as cold sweat dripped.

[Is... is she also...?!!!]

"Are you okay, Hinowa?" Tsukuyo asked, concerned. "What's wrong?"

"I should be... fine," Hinowa replied with a forced smile, glancing at Kawaki with an expression that seemed to say, [This is all your fault...]

"So, what were you about to say?" Hinowa asked, turning to Kawaki.

"N-nothing... nothing at all... hehe..." Kawaki stammered, his face twitching as he laughed nervously. [I've messed up now! This is bad! Bad! I can't just leave these two alone! What should I do? What should I do?! It's not just a matter of being exposed anymore—this is a much bigger problem! Am I that good at... No, this is not the time to think about that! What should I do? This is a severe situation!]

"Hey, Kawaki, you look a bit strained. What's going on?" Tsukuyo asked.

"N-nothing," Kawaki forced a smile, then suddenly thought of something and raised a finger as he suggested, "Um... how about we eat separately from now on? I mean, no other reason, just that... it feels a bit cramped, you know? Hehehe..."

"Sure!" Hinowa and Tsukuyo answered in unison without hesitation.

[Why are you both so in sync at a time like this?!] Kawaki thought, his sense of despair deepening. [And why did you both get shy after I suggested it? I don't get it! How eager are you two to eat separately?! This is way too rushed!]

...

At nine in the morning, after finishing nearly sixty breakfasts with the members of Hyakka, Kawaki staggered out like a lifeless zombie. To be precise... he was utterly broken, inside and out.

Of course, an ordinary man might also break if he suddenly found out that his one night of effort had made him the father of sixty unborn children and the stepfather of one child.

It's a human reaction.

Kawaki completed his morning patrol duties in this state, even though he was thoroughly broken. Despite everything, he carried out the patrol with meticulous attention.

...

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At noon, after leaving messages with sixty women that he wouldn't be coming back for lunch because of work, Kawaki took the opportunity to escape to the streets.

When Zenzou found Kawaki in the park after Kawaki had called him out, he found Kawaki repeatedly bashing his bloodied forehead against a lamppost.

"Hey, hey, what's going on?" Zenzou asked as he approached Kawaki. "Didn't the plan work? With sixty women, a sincere confession should have helped you get rid of at least half of them, right?"

"Hehe..." Kawaki turned around, revealing a face that had been completely ruined. "Zenzou, I'm... going to be a father."

"Ah, congratulations."

"The father of sixty... no, sixty-one children."

There was a long silence before Zenzou quietly turned to leave, raising his hand in a farewell wave. "Sorry for disturbing you while you're basking in the joy of fatherhood. I'll just be on my way..."

"Wait!!" Kawaki suddenly grabbed Zenzou's shoulder and held on tightly. "Don't leave me! What should I do? What should I do?!"

"How should I know?!" Zenzou replied, exasperated. "You're incredible! No one else in the world could get sixty women pregnant in one night. If they weren't pregnant, you might have been able to get rid of a few by confessing your true feelings. But in this situation, there's no saving it."

"So... um..." Kawaki's voice trembled. "What's my fate, usually?"

"Honestly, I don't think any romance manga features a guy who successfully conquers sixty women at once," Zenzou pondered, stroking his chin. "If there were only two, they might just hack you to death. But in your case, dismemberment is a given. Though it's unclear into how many pieces, it should be more than sixty, considering the kids' shares."

"Ah... I see... hehe..."

"But there might still be a way out," Zenzou added. "After all, there are kids involved. They might forgive you for the children's sake. You know, a childhood without a father can be tough."

"Really? So, I should just come clean? Ask for forgiveness for the sake of the kids? Would that really work?!"

"Are you... not afraid of dying?"

...

Back in Yoshiwara, during dinner time.

"Um... Hinowa," Kawaki said, looking at her as she added rice to his bowl. "You shouldn't go out much these days... for the sake of your health, you know..."

"Oh my!" Hinowa gasped softly, her face flushing slightly as she continued, "You... you noticed? I thought it would take longer for you to figure it out."

"I'm not that dense..." Kawaki replied, his face twitching as black lines appeared on his forehead. "Anyway, just stay in your room for now. I'll handle everything—shopping, laundry... all the household chores."

"It seems like... you've changed quite a bit," Hinowa remarked. "Do men always change this much before and after marriage?"

"Well, it's unavoidable."

"But what about work? With Hyakka on break, will you be okay handling it all on your own? Should I talk to Tsukuyo and the others?"

"No need! I'm totally fine!" Kawaki suddenly perked up. "Actually, I've started to really enjoy work! It helps me forget a lot of my worries! Ahahaha..."

"You really are becoming more dependable~ Now I can finally be at ease."

...

In Tsukuyo's room.

Looking at the hotpot on the table, Kawaki sighed and muttered, "Tsukuyo, it's hotpot again today..."

"Sorry, I'm not very skilled at cooking," Tsukuyo replied. "But I did see a lot of cooking class ads yesterday, and I was thinking of signing up."

"No need!" Kawaki quickly downed the scalding hotpot in front of him in one gulp as if the heat didn't bother him. "I love it! I absolutely love it! Hotpot is perfect!"