I Only Want to Lie Flat But Am Forced to Cultivate Immortality-Chapter 62 - 51: The Child’s Examination

On the night of March 4th, Wu Yaohua’s family next door was cooking up a storm, and Xu Qing could smell the fragrant aroma of stewed old hen wafting through the funeral shop.

Tomorrow was the day for Wu Wencai to take the child student exam. Although his cousin Wu Zhiyuan had already passed the child student exam years ago, he also had to go to the Prefecture City in a few days to take the provincial exam to become a student.

The so-called student is what the common people often refer to as a scholar.

Achieving a title is a significant event in life for ordinary people!

Hence, Wu Yaohua hadn’t been skimping on food for several days, with the household having fish and meat in almost every meal, including breakfast and lunch, and even adding a late-night snack after their evening meal.

The aroma of their meals drifting next door every mealtime could even tempt a zombie to come alive.

However, the diet of low-level zombies is limited, mainly consuming liquid foods like blood plasma. Even the few edible items like laurel fruits, incense candles, and persimmons shouldn’t be eaten in excess.

These items are rich in certain elements and can provide specific nutritional supplements for zombies.

Xu Qing speculated that these might have some maintenance effect on corpse teeth, nails, and corpse hair.

For instance, after long-term consumption of candles made from animal fat and laurel fruit oil, his newly grown corpse hair appeared noticeably more vigorous, with a smoother and more delicate texture.

He highly suspected that the secreted oil was actually his own corpse oil.

As a result, every few days, he had to perform the tasks of removing hair and oil, grinding his teeth, and trimming his nails.

"Wandering corpses of the third category cannot consume regular grains and drink sweet spring water like ordinary people. The three corpse transformations are still in the category of mutations, only upon reaching the Undying Bone can one have no dietary restrictions..."

Xu Qing lit a candle, his nostrils filled with the fragrance of wax and smoke, while he held a Corpse Talk book, silently reciting it.

As for tomorrow’s child student exam, he was not nervous at all.

The scripture he obtained earlier by crossing over a scholar who drowned included essays from various dynasties, and he was already familiar with them. Moreover, the child student exam was not as challenging as the scholar or top graduate exams, and did not require much on-the-spot thinking.

...

On March 5th, the child student exam officially began.

Early in the morning, Wu Yaohua’s two sons banged on the door of Xu Qing’s funeral shop. Xu Qing didn’t return to the Shuimen Bridge Residence last night, allowing them to catch him taking his leave at the shop.

Carrying a food box, Wu Yaohua saw his two sons knocking on the neighbor’s shop door early in the morning, and said angrily, "Today is Wencai’s exam, why do you bother the neighbors for company?"

Wu Zhiyuan, puzzled, replied, "Didn’t Brother Xu and Wencai register for the spring exam at the Government Office together the other day? He surely has to take the exam today too. Didn’t you know about this, Dad?"

"Is there such a thing?" Wu Yaohua looked amazed.

Everyone runs a funeral shop, but why is it that you are striving for a title?

"Putting that aside, Zhiyuan, why were you calling out just now? Didn’t I say that’s your Uncle Xu?"

"Dad, you’re being unreasonable. Brother Xu only appears older and established early in life, but he’s actually not that old. Why should we call him uncle?"

Wu Yaohua glared, "I call him my peer, so you should address him the same. What does it look like otherwise?"

As the father and son bickered, the door of the funeral shop opened slightly, and Xu Qing appeared, saying, "Old Wu, Zhiyuan has a point. We’re all neighbors, no need for such formalities."

Securing the shop door, Wu Yaohua noticed that Xu Qing was empty-handed, dressed only in a neat robe, and asked, "Are you going to the exam like this? Not even taking food and water?"

Xu Qing glanced at the food box in Wu Yaohua’s hand and the book chest containing ink, paper, and various books, and curiously responded,

"This is just the child student exam, held in the courtyard next to the Government Office. The exam ends the same day it starts. It’s not like we’re going to the Capital City, so no need to carry so much."

"Moreover, the exam venue provides ink, paper, and stationery, no need to bring our own. Even if we did, they’d confiscate them to prevent cheating. It’s better to go empty-handed and finish early to go back home sooner."

Hearing this, Wu Yaohua turned to Wu Zhiyuan, who had prior exam experience, and hesitantly asked, "Is that true?"

Wu Zhiyuan reluctantly nodded.

In the end, Wu Yaohua still brought the food box to the exam venue for them.

This reveals the heartfelt care of parents, always fearing their child won’t have enough money or clothing when going far away, even if it’s just a small exam a few streets away, they’d still prepare thoroughly.

On the other hand, Xu Qing, looking like an ordinary pedestrian, walked leisurely with his hands behind his back, showing no signs of exam nerves!

Arriving at the courtyard set up for exams beside the Government Office, they saw that almost all the examinees and their families carried large bags and boxes, even Wu Yaohua couldn’t help but waver, "Brother Xu, aren’t you bringing anything into the exam? That doesn’t seem right! Luckily, I brought extra, if needed, you can share some of mine."

Upon hearing this, Xu Qing gave him an appreciative look. This neighbor was quite righteous.

Fortunately, the exam regulations had not changed. Those examinees who brought their own ink, paper, and stationery had their items confiscated by the clerks upon entering the exam hall.

Besides this, there were special Examination Officers performing body searches to prevent cheating.

Several examinees carrying cheat sheets and even hidden books in their underpants were caught on the spot.

Luckily, this was just a minor child student exam. Those caught cheating would at most be disqualified from the exam. If it were the formal imperial exams, according to the laws of Dayong, they would be subjected to a hundred strokes of the cane, and more severe cases might be exiled or even executed!

When Xu Qing entered the exam hall, he bumped into several familiar faces from the three subdivisions and six departments of the Government Office, who were tasked with maintaining order.

The leading constable, Zhao Zhonghe’s expression turned complex upon seeing Xu Qing. He was puzzled, how could this guy be everywhere!

It’s one thing to see him at the Government Office, but even at the elegant Book Phoenix Pavilion it wasn’t unusual. But hell, why was he here at the exam too!

Could it be that he’s tired of the funeral business and aiming for a title to become an official?

He couldn’t guess that Xu Qing’s aim for a title was just for bettering his funeral business.

With the scholar’s title, he wouldn’t have to kneel before officials, and it exempted him from taxes and labor services. Even if he were to preside over funerals in the future, the families would feel honored.

When relatives talked about the deceased, they could boast about having a scholar officiate, making even the Path to the Underworld seem grand.

Neighbors and friends would also find it respectable, saying that so-and-so passed away, and their son was so filial that he invited a scholar for the funeral!

After all, scholars were rare in those days.

...

The child student exam was divided into two sessions, each comprising three papers. The exam content included writing passages, arithmetic calculations, and answering moral and etiquette-related questions.

Xu Qing quickly finished the first round of papers. After submitting his answers, he received the second round of papers from the examiner.

"This child student exam really isn’t difficult, but the scholar exam might not be so easy."

After all, a few days ago at the Government Office, he had seen an old child student over fifty years old retaking the exam!

According to others, that old child student took the exam year after year. Now at sixty-nine years old, even his own grandson had married and had children.

On the registration day, it was his son and grandson who escorted him.

This shows that becoming a student is no easier than passing official exams.

After finishing all the questions, Xu Qing handed in his papers early.

The examiner, receiving his paper, indicated that he could leave the exam hall.

It was still early, and the results wouldn’t be out until that afternoon. With time to spare, Xu Qing decided to visit the nearby Government Office.

A couple of days ago, the Crown Prince had encountered an assassination attempt by Celestial Heart Sect members at the Book Phoenix Pavilion. Though the Crown Prince was unharmed, the Celestial Heart Sect’s Incense Master stationed in Linhe died on the spot.

Now, the bodies of the Incense Master and the dead cultists lay in the Government Office’s morgue!

Having completed his child student exam, Xu Qing felt he deserved to reward himself with a few corpses.