I Only Want to Lie Flat But Am Forced to Cultivate Immortality-Chapter 115 - 82: The Immortal’s Banquet

Aside from the Immortal title, they also gave the black cat a common name, calling it Xuan Yu.

Xu Qing returned to the Funeral Shop. Xuan Yu darted back from the courtyard wall, running in front of him and asked:

"When are you going to the port to buy me fish?"

"What fish?"

"The fish needed to hire a cat. I heard everything you talked about earlier."

Xu Qing pointed to the hall’s tablet and said, "Look at that Immortal tablet. ’Qing’ is my name, ’Yu’ is your name. Combined, it makes one entire hall."

"In other words, I am the Immortal, and you are also the Immortal. The hall is jointly established, and we don’t have any Galloping Immortal Disciple, where could we get offerings?"

"But hiring a cat doesn’t count as establishing a hall."

Seeing he couldn’t fool the cat, Xu Qing relented and said, "Our hall isn’t fully built yet. Once it’s done, not just fish, even if you want to eat Piggy Dragon, it won’t be a problem!"

"Piggy Dragon, what sort of dragon is that?"

"A dragon that swims in the water, runs on the ground, just can’t fly."

While drawing a big picture, Xu Qing lit a Yellow Incense stick and prepared a jar of Ha La Qi’er, also known as Red Grain Thin Water, for their hall’s opening celebration.

As the white smoke wafted, Xu Qing recited the Assist Soldier Spell. The moment the Yellow Incense was lit, it seemed to gain spirituality, splitting into several strands, drifting outside the Funeral Shop.

What he lit was no ordinary Yellow Incense but Spirit Incense that he meticulously concocted.

Xuan Yu resisted the urge to inhale, letting the incense smoke drift into the Netherworld to seek nearby Immortals.

Xu Qing used his Qi Observation Skill, seeing shadows flickering outside the Funeral Shop, including Wood Charms, snakes, and rats.

Under the pull of the Assist Soldier Spell and Spirit Incense, whether they were wild Immortals, real Immortals, or other unclean entities, all were drawn over.

The scent of Spirit Incense was such that mighty evil spirits wouldn’t be interested, so Xu Qing wasn’t worried about attracting something he couldn’t handle.

When the Yellow Incense finished burning, the flickering shadows outside the Funeral Shop also disappeared.

Xuan Yu widened his eyes, a childish voice full of disbelief: "How can they just eat for free?"

Xu Qing frowned slightly, pondering where the problem lay.

By right, establishing an Immortal hall requires making connections with Immortals. As long as the word is out, local Immortals should come to support the new hall.

Based on Xu Qing’s understanding of Galloping Immortals, they stick together like a close-knit group, supporting each other against outsiders.

To prevent external Immortals from stealing business and incense, local Immortals generally remain united and occasionally hold gatherings to exchange insights.

But why weren’t they coming to support his hall establishment?

Xuan Yu wondered, "Could it be they don’t like Cat Immortals?"

"What logic is that? Even a grey rat can be an Immortal, why can’t I?"

Xu Qing remained silent. At this point, it seemed the problem wasn’t with Xuan Yu but with himself.

Understanding his own situation, as a Zombie, no matter how well he played the part, he didn’t meet the conditions for a Galloping Immortal Disciple, who were typically living humans.

Whether Xuan Yu alone could support the hall, Xu Qing delved into deep thought.

The most common Immortals are the Mainstream Five: Fox, Yellow Weasel, White Weasel, Willow, and Hedgehog, among many other branches like chickens, monkeys, cats, and dogs.

Xu Qing had discussed such matters with an old performer from Baima Temple.

There are monkey Immortals whose Galloping Immortal Disciples can climb trees as if walking on flat ground, able to perform tricks with a stick.

There are rooster Immortals who are good at summoning spirits. When a child’s soul is lost, the disciple channels the ’Crowned Young Master’, walks around the house clucking, and crows to summon the child’s soul back.

Dog Immortals specialize in finding people and objects, subduing Yin Ghosts and other entities. When a disciple channels a dog Immortal, their nose becomes super sensitive, and they gain sharp teeth, capable of chewing through tough bones.

Watching the Cat Immortal in front of him, Xu Qing speculated that if this cat spirit possessed someone, it might not resist chasing mice.

How messy would that be!

Fortunately, he didn’t need to be possessed. Other Galloping Immortal Disciples require fine food and drink offerings to coax the Immortal to descend.

After indulging, the Immortal enjoys the experience of being human, often reveling and displaying their true nature through the disciple’s body.

This explains why Galloping Immortal Disciples often appear eccentric to outsiders.

Once Xu Qing identified the issue, he retreated to the background, letting Xuan Yu burn incense and invite spirits on his own.

With Xu Qing out of the way, nearby Immortals soon left their messages.

He could hear chickens crowing, snakes hissing, and a chorus of indistinct chatter, like children learning to speak but not fully articulate.

These Immortals likely weren’t advanced enough to speak human language clearly. Xu Qing listened for a while without understanding much, but the sounds seemed flattering, as if showing goodwill toward Xuan Yu.

"What did they say? Can we establish this hall or not?"

Xu Qing’s tone was noticeably unfriendly.

Xuan Yu jumped onto the offering table. Yang Qiying and Liu Youdao’s tablets were pushed to the sides, with the Cat Immortal Hall’s tablet now in the center.

"They didn’t object. Old Grey and Mrs. Grey will visit in two days. Mr. Feng and Mr. Liu have matters at hand and will come after their disciples’ tasks are done."