Four Brothers and a Bride-Chapter 124

ASHAL

"I’m fine. No injuries were sustained."

"Are you sure?" I insist as Demi exhales softly. "I got worried after watching the news clip. It looked..."

"Ashal, I’m fine. Trust me on that."

"Ok. I’m sorry I can’t be there. There’s just too much stuff going on at home and I wanted a break to clear my head."

"Lucky you. I wish I could get a change of environment too." She sighs wistfully. "Anyway, thanks for checking up on me. I appreciate it."

"I wish I could do better. Hang in there."

After the call, I turn to Ashton. "I can’t believe she staged everything, and with Mila of all people??? I never even knew those two could strike up a conversation longer than sixty seconds much less hatch a plan."

Ashton is sprawled on my couch with a hand over his face. He has been upset since he came in this morning for obvious reasons. It’s weird but I am starting to understand how frustrating it all can be.

I spent the previous night ruminating over my alleged feelings for Madeline and while I want to believe that there’s nothing amorous about it, there exists a plethora of behaviors that belie my stance. I can’t help but wonder if I am so in love with Maddie that everyone else can tell except me.

Is this what it feels like to love someone you can’t have? There’s a hollow pit in my stomach that reeks of fear, sadness and frustration for the woman I can’t have. I now see what Ashton has been going through and honestly, I strongly commend him for his impeccable restraint all these months. I am going berserk not knowing how Maddi is faring right now. I can’t imagine being under the same roof with her and thinking straight. How does Ashton do it? How can he stand seeing Demi with Ashley? I could never.

"Are you okay?" I ask my brother.

He sits upright and kneads the kinks out of his neck. My guess, from the bags under his eyes, is that he barely slept a wink last night.

"I had to beg Duncan not to tell father about everything. He wouldn’t have hurt a hair on Mila’s head but Demi...that would just give him another reason to make her suffer." A short breath whistles from his lips as he digs his fingers into his hair. "I have a lot on my plate right now. Father is onto us. Adriana is in the wind again. Mila is pushing for our wedding to take place which I am not prepared for and now Demi is playing with fire. I don’t have the mental band width to tackle all of this at once. I can’t protect her, Ashal. If she crosses father, he won’t spare her."

"No, he won’t." I concur.

"She is currently at loggerheads with mother so I doubt mother will be eager to protect her. She’s been through a lot and I understand how badly she must be hurting but this isn’t the solution. If she tries to mess up father’s plan and bring shame to the family, I don’t know what he will do to her."

I take a good look at him. It should be Ashley worrying so much but no, Ashley isn’t. That’s mostly because Ashley is not always present or perceptive around the mansion to look out for his wife. He has been burying himself in work as a form of distraction from the chaos his actions have caused.

I don’t blame Ashton for his feelings. If Demi had been receiving the kind of love any woman deserves, Ashton might have been able to dial back on his emotions.

I know this by recalling how I felt when Madeline was about to marry the wrong guy. I couldn’t even breathe properly. I almost killed Hunter in my rage.

I rest a hand on Ashton’s knee. "You don’t have to do it all alone. You can tell Ashley the truth and let him worry about her, then face the things you can control."

"You think I haven’t? Ashley admitted that Demi won’t listen to him. She can barely stand his presence. If anyone can get through to her, Ashley thinks it’s me but here I am, woefully failing at that." He surges to his feet and paces. "I don’t have time for this. I need to see Keith. I am heading to his farm house to have a conversation about meeting Adriana again. I just hope Demi doesn’t do anything stupid before I can clear my plate."

"Go on. You can’t do it all. Adriana is our sister and she deserves to be our priority. We owe it to her after all these years. Demi can wait."

He nods grimly and turns to leave.

"Oh, Ash, get some sleep first. You look like shit and it’s uncomfortable staring at my face looking like shit." That’s usually his line and it feels so good to throw it back in his face.

He waves at me.

"Cree will be here soon."

"What? Why?"

"You know why." He replies without turning. "Be nice to her. She was your friend once and she’s wants to make amends." He disappears through the door while I huff out a breath.

***

"He said that?" Cree asks with a hint of amusement when I offer her a drink. She looks exquisite in a sleeveless jumpsuit and heels. I didn’t realize how much I have missed her. She looks really beautiful and smells great too. Seeing her stirs memories of our date and the other dates after it.

"Yeah. Apparently, you want to make amends?"

"Horseshit. I mean, of course I’d love to patch things up but that’s not why he begged me to pay you a visit."

"He begged you?" I don’t know how I feel about Ashton’s desperation.

"Kind of." She drops her glass ceremoniously on the table and leans forward. "Let’s forget all that. How have you been? This is me asking genuinely and not because Ashton asked me to come here." Her eyes warm with concern. "The last time we spoke, I was very worried about you. You passed out drunk and when you woke up, you were a bit hysterical. Have you been well?"

A red hue tints my cheeks. "It should be me apologizing. I shouldn’t have lashed out on you that very day simply because I didn’t agree with the things you were saying. I’m sorry."

"I’m sorry too. I should have been more understanding." A quiet moment passes between us while our eyes hold. "So, what’s really going on with you? Ashton sounded worried." When I shift uncomfortably, she gives a thin smile. "You don’t have to feel awkward. I know you want to talk to someone about how you’re feeling and maybe you think your brothers won’t get it. That’s why I am here, to be that listening ear that won’t judge."

"You say that now..."

"I mean it. Whatever feelings I once had for you...poof. Gone, but it’s not because you aren’t a great guy. I didn’t start off being honest with you. I was there to collect a pay check from Shay so I never really bothered to fully open myself up to the spark between us back then." She shrugs.

"I am not here to force things though, just to be a friend. If it ever gets awkward and any feelings start to rear their heads again, I promise to tell you and discharge myself from this self-appointed role of being your confidante."

Her offer is juicy but I am still skeptical.

"Go on, tell me before it eats you up."

After debating in my head for almost a minute, I sigh in resignation. "FINE. If you haven’t already guessed it, it’s got to do with a girl."

"Typical."

"So much for not judging."

"Oops, sorry."

I go on to tell her vaguely about Madeline and how I think I have strong feelings for her but she isn’t a woman I can be with for personal reasons. I try my best to leave out as much detail as I can without confusing Cree. She listens keenly as I recount saving Maddie from Hunter, our first and second kiss etc.

"So, how does Maddie feel about all this?"

I give a lazy shrug. "I don’t know. She hasn’t made any moves that make me suspect she welcomes whatever is going on between us. She shies away mostly. I think she’s scared of us being together."

"Why do you think that?" Cree presses on with raptured eyes.

Because I am currently married to her sister and I am the guy who practically stole two years of her sister’s life while my family and I trapped her in a penthouse like an embarrassing little secret. Rather than tell Cree what’s in my head, I decide to mask it.

"I guess not everyone is ok with fame. You weren’t."

Cree nods. "At first, that had a lot to do with Shay but now, I believe I prefer my quiet existence." She locks eyes with mine. "Here’s my two cents. If family means everything to you and pursuing this would hurt them and you, I suggest you treat this as a fleeting affair. I’m sure it’ll go away. You fell for me once and I bet you thought you couldn’t move on after my secret came to light. Even then, you chose your family. Do it again, especially since she isn’t exactly fighting for whatever you both have going on. Choose family. That’s honorable for people like you, right?" She sips her drink and watches me over the glass.

"Now, you’re just telling me what I need to hear. Get out of her head, Ashton!" This time, I lean close. "What would you do if the roles were reversed, Cree Baxter? Humor me."

"Damn, you want her that bad, huh? I’m jealous." After a small laugh, she tosses her head to the side, revealing a nicely sculpted ear bereft of an earring. "I’d ride the wave for a bit to see where it leads us. I’m not even a part of this story but the suspense is killing me. I badly want to know if this is a star-crossed romance like Romeo and Juliet or just a hormonal reaction that a quickie at the back of a car can cure."

"You’re hilarious." My phone starts to ring and I almost drop it. It’s Maddie!

***

She rarely calls me out of the blue. Why now? I can hazard a guess but I am not in the right frame of mind to lie to her convincingly.

"I went by your office." She croaks out, crying.

"Maddie, what’s wrong?"

"My boyfriend, Alfie, they found him dead in his car. It was on the news."

My heart breaks to a million tiny pieces as she continues to cry and sniffle on the other end of the phone. Cree is still in the living room, enjoying her drink and twiddling with the TV remote to find a good show to watch when I peek from the first floor. I am glad she isn’t being nosy to eavesdrop on my call.

"Calm down, Maddi. What are you saying? What boyfriend? Are you being harassed by the police for the death of this person?"

"No. They took me in to answer a few questions since we were together the day before he...I just don’t know what to do. I don’t want to worry Olivia and my parents don’t know about Alfie. I didn’t know who else to call."

She called me. Is this a sign? I shake off the giddy feeling and focus on her pain. I don’t know what I can do to make her feel better. I’d love to console her but my guilt-stricken face might give her cause for concern. Plus, my brothers won’t appreciate me stoking the fire of this dangerous romance.

"Are you busy?"

Shit. Shit! She wants to meet. Gosh, I wish I could go to her.

"I’m a long way from the office." I blurt out instead of dousing her hopes. "I’m at my second penthouse up the hills, almost at the outskirts of town. I had some pending work. I’m sorry I’m not there to help you, Maddi. I really wish I was."

She takes a few breaths. "I understand. I don’t know what I was thinking." She sniffles again. "I have no right to bother you like this. You have your hands full with work and Liv..."

"You’re my family too. I also care about you. Liv won’t forgive me if I let anything happen to you." I close a hand over my mouth before I can say more and regret my words.

"Thank you, Mr. Ashal. I feel much better now after talking to you."

"I’m glad I could help in some way. Take a break and get some rest. You’re grieving. I’ll see you when I get back."

My chest tightens when she hangs up. She’ll never forgive me if she ever learns that I had a hand in Alfie’s death. I slide to the floor and cover my face with my hands. What have I become? What am I going to do?

"That must have been a hard phone call."

I look up into Cree’s face. So, she is an eavesdropper. Whatever. I have no prerogative nor am I in the mood to judge anyone. I feel her hands wrap around me and rock me slowly.

"You’ll be fine." She continues to hum while I allow her words soothe me.

***

"Where are you?"

I ignore the temptation to roll my eyes. "I’m not a baby. I don’t need a babysitter!" I reply with annoyance.

"This is no way to treat a guest, Ashal. You intentionally gave me that game to play so I wouldn’t hear you driving out, right? How could you sneak out of your own house if you aren’t acting like a baby?" Cree laments. "Just tell me, are you headed to see her?"

"I’m headed back to my family’s mansion to see MY family. I miss them, okay. If Ashton worries, tell him I’ll be at home. You are welcome to stay the night at the penthouse if you like. I’ll hang up now."

I chuck my phone into the pigeonhole and swerve in a different direction from home. Maddi didn’t pick up when I called her back after a few hours. It’s been an extra two hours since then and I can’t seem to reach her. I have no idea where she is or if she’s okay. I have left her texts in capital letters demanding for a reply so I know she’s okay but still nothing.

I pull up in front of her dorm and try her number one more time.

"Damn it, Maddi, pick up your phone! Where the hell are you?" I mutter, punching my phone like a maniac. I want to go in but that would cause an uproar when the other female students see me. I text Maddi that I am outside her dorm and wait.

Ten minutes later, she replies with a shocked emoji. When I see her rushing down the stairs towards my car, a huge ball of relief unfurls in my chest. She’s fine. From her face and disheveled hair, I can tell she must have been sleeping. As she approaches me, she combs her hair with her fingers and cowers shyly.

"Mr. Ashal?" She utters in disbelief through the passenger window. "I thought you were out of town."

"I just got back." I try not to sound breathless. "You weren’t taking my calls or returning my texts. I was worried."

"You asked me to get some rest and I did. I’m sorry I got you worried. I was sleeping while my phone was charging silently."

"Get in. Everyone will soon start staring."

She obliges and shuts the door. Now that we are both so close, my breath hitches. She has a peculiar scent around her that I have never smelt on anyone before.

"My apologies again for your loss." My eyes are fixated away from her face as I talk. "I didn’t know you had a new boyfriend. You must be hurting a lot. What can I do to make you feel better?"

Maddi scoops her hair behind her ears. "You’ve done more than enough, Mr. Ashal. I’m really fine. It still feels like a bad dream but I will get over it soon."

"Do you mind me asking how long you two were together?"

"Three weeks." She chuckles. "I was still getting to know him and vice versa. He had his flaws but he wasn’t a bad person. I guess I just feel so shocked to have lost someone so close. I’ve never felt this before, the shock of death so close. I was the last person with him." She bows her head. "It doesn’t make any sense. He was fine. He didn’t do drugs even though he looked like a druggie. He only drank lots of alcohol. I don’t know what to believe." Before the tears hit her thigh, I wrap my arm around her and plant a kiss on her hair.

"I’m so sorry, Maddie. You’ve had to endure a lot of pain that you don’t deserve. I wish I could turn back the hands of time and undo all the events that have hurt you." My heart skids when she hugs me back while crying. I continue to console her while she blames her fate and weeps.

We must have been clinging onto each other for about five minutes before the tears stop running and the awkwardness of our position hits Maddi. Immediately, she pulls away from me and apologizes.

"It’s okay."

"No, it’s not. I should know my limits. You’re my sister’s husband." She wipes her eyes.

"For now." I hum under my breath.

"What?" ƒгeeweɓn૦vel.com

Sighing, I lean back in my chair. "Liv and I are getting a divorce soon. That’s what she demanded of me."

"What? What about the baby?"

"She wants us to be co-parents. I tried to talk her out of it but her mind is made up, Maddie. I honestly can’t blame her. She loathes me as a partner. We didn’t exactly start out on the best foot. If this is what will make her happy and how I get to compensate for everything she’s endured under my roof, I won’t fight it this time." I stare out into the gathering clouds. "I sincerely want her to be happy. Clearly, it can’t be with me. She has given up on us. She keeps pressing me to start dating again, could you imagine that?" A short, frustrated laugh leaves my lips. "I just hope she finds true happiness with a man that will value her this time."

Maddie remains quiet for a few seconds.

"I’m sorry you two couldn’t find your happily ever after together. I really thought she would see how much you’ve changed and give you one more shot."

Without looking at her, I give a thin smile at my dashboard. "She’s given me more than enough chances and I screwed it up every time. She and I could never seem to meet each other halfway. Whenever she was prepared to love me, I was wallowing in self-pity and self-loathing to recognize her heart. When I was willing to bare my heart out and put her first, her affections had changed. It’s a never-ending circle." Now, I look at Maddie. "This is for the best. I don’t want to waste her time any longer."

I pinch her cheeks. "Cheer up. I thought you of all people would be popping champagne atop a table in a club at the sound of this news."

"That was before I got to know this version of you." She dips her eyes and burrows her hands in her thighs. "That was before I stopped hating you. I’m sorry if you’re hurting. I no longer want you to die alone in a pit in the middle of fucking nowhere. I want you to find happiness too, like my sister one day."

Her words cause a warm feeling to bloom in my chest. I stifle the urge to kiss her. That would be super awkward.

"Thank you, Maddie. I really needed to hear that. It means so much more coming from you."

We keep our eyes trained on each other as the balmy night air whistles outside. My heart is pounding and I wonder if she’s also feeling everything I am feeling in this moment. Curious, I start to lean forward slowly towards her face. The fact that she doesn’t immediately back up seems like a good sign. Our noses touch and our lips tease each other. Just before I can swoop in, her hand shoves my chest.

"I-I can’t..." She twitches her cardigan closer to her body. "I’m sorry. We can’t do this."

Rather than feel hurt, I feel grateful that she stopped me.

"I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have...forgive me."

"I don’t think we should keep this up. Liv is my sister. I don’t want to hurt her anymore than she already has been hurt. Let’s just ignore whatever this thing between us is and go on like we always have; as brother-in-law and sister-in-law."

"I understand."

She turns away but not fast enough for me to see her blurry eyes, unlocks the door and gets out. Before she can take three steps, I jump out of the car and call out to her.

"Maddi!"

She turns around. "Please, just go."

I circle my car to stand in front of her. Thankfully, there isn’t anyone milling around.

"Why Alfie? Why did you choose to date him after your experience with Hunter?"

"What do you mean?"

"I want to know why you keep going after guys that clearly aren’t good for you. It’s disturbing."

"How was Alfie bad for me? He brought me out of the rut I was stuck in after the horror of my kidnapping. He showed me a good time."

"But you clearly weren’t comfortable with the way he treated you. The way he sexually harassed you, slapping your bum in public, catcalling you. You hated it. Why then did you endure all that? Is it so hard to pick responsible guys that you don’t have to hide from your family? Is it?"

I am terrified of which kind of man she’ll end up choosing again to get her over the stump of Alfie’s death since her choices are usually questionable.

Maddi backs away from me, eyes widening. "You said you didn’t know I had gotten a boyfriend. You’re not supposed to know what Alfie looks like or what’s he’s like around me."

My heart plummets to my stomach as I realize where she’s going.

"How did you know all that?" she asks with narrowed eyes. My silence makes her shake her head in terror. "Mr. Ashal, I need you to answer me. WERE YOU WATCHING US THE DAY ALFIE DIED? WERE YOU HERE AT MY DORM WATCHING ALFIE DROP ME OFF?"