The Guide to Conquering Earthlings - Chapter 2: The 0

The world is in ruins. Extreme sub-zero temperatures suffocate the surface, making even simple survival an ordeal. Frozen derelicts of bygone eras span across massive ice wastes. And the survivors closely guard any technology rediscovered within.The only escape from the deadly climate is beneath the surface. But it’s another disaster underground. Monstrous machines lurk in the depths. Unhinged demigods war against them, dying over and over, treating it all like a game. The land itself shifts over time, more contraption than rock. And an ominous prophecy states that the key to everything waits on four heroes - but nobody knows who or where they are.When an expedition into the far uncharted north goes terribly wrong, Keith Winterscar and his father get trapped together in a desperate fight for survival. Stumbling upon an ancient war of titanic scale; the two will need to set their differences aside while they struggle against Gods, legends, and the grand secrets of the realm that lies below.

Original name: Prince Charming's Next Door, finished. One day, she slept with him accidentally. Two month later, she found herself pregnant, so they got married with baby. “Mr. Gu, I like the dishes of this restaurant.” Then the chef of that restaurant was hired as theirs. “Mr. Gu, I like the bags of that brand.” Then the designer of that brand was employed exclusively for her. She thought of herself as a stranger to him after marriage as she had always been, but in fact he doted on her totally beyond her imagination. He would satisfy all her demands, except letting her find a job. She kind of got anxiously bored at home, so she sneaked out to find herself a job. However, whichever company she was hired by would go bankrupt somehow or other. Finally, she got to know it had been always him who had done mischief surreptitiously. She went to question him angrily, but he gave her a job with a smirky smile. The next day when she went to take the office with delight, she found her employee ID card on the desk said ‘Name: Qin Zhi’ai, Position: Wife of Gu Yusheng’.

“She is the one who forced me to marry her, she is also the one who pushed away ShuangAi from me, she threatened my family with her family power and all these years, she did everything to subdue me...that evil woman MuTan“

After being killed by a high-velocity tree-hug, Arlo is transported to a new world of skills, stats, and levels where those brave and talented enough to conquer ancient Delves are rewarded with incredible supernatural power. Unfortunately for Arlo, there is no tutorial, and he is immediately forced to tackle a Delve set to the highest difficulty with a party of adventurers who are not only strangers to him, but strangers to each other as well. Arlo has no armor, no weapons, no knowledge of the world at large, and his party is growing increasingly suspicious of his lack of preparation and paper-thin excuses for how he got there.There's also the fact that the System seems to be treating Arlo's situation like a big, cosmic joke.Determined not to die again, Arlo forgoes putting any points into his highest stat, Intelligence, and instead dumps everything he's got into Fortitude. After all, who needs equipment or fighting skills when you can eat fireballs for breakfast and still ask for more hot sauce?Mage Tank is a comedic LitRPG adventure set in an epic fantasy world that is rapidly evolving as new and powerful secrets of the Delves are uncovered. There are strong horror themes, graphic violence, overindulgent use of naughty language, and poorly constructed jokes. Mage Tank features slow progression and intelligent characters who spend time making intentional build choices. It’s not action all-the-time, but Arlo’s life is replete with danger and, more importantly, consequences.Cover art generated with MidJourney and Canva.Maps and world-building support by Sir Raiu Koren.